*Names below are changed to protect their identities and this article is taken from Cosmopolitan, UK edition.
Sandy* 22, from UK agrees to the title above.
“I think cheating is wrong, so when I began sleeping with someone behind my boyfriend David’s back, it made me realise how unhappy I’d become”. David was her first real love but she says that, over time, they grew apart. “I got bored. He wanted to stay in all the time; I wanted to go out and do things. He didn’t have a proper job so never had much money. I just couldn’t see us having a future together. But he was my first love, I cared about him and I couldn’t bring myself to end it.”
Sandy met Aaron during the brief split from David last year and they had a fling. A few months on, she and David got back together, but she bumped into Aaron again and the pair started sleeping together while David was on a holiday. “Aaron was older, more mature, had a great job and wanted us to go out and do things together.” For Sandy, he was everything David wasn’t.
But Sandy couldn’t sustain her double life. One night David caught her trying to delete an incriminating text from Aaron and soon after, they separated. “I felt so guilty. I couldn’t carry on seeing two guys. But being with Aaron showed me I could be happy with someone else. In a way, it spurred me to end an unhappy relationship.” She and Aaron went on to see each other after that.
Sandy says she wouldn’t be able to forgive someone who cheated on her. “I’d be devastated and would end it there and then. It’d be so hurtful to think he’d needed to go elsewhere. It would really mess me up.”
She had never intended to be unfaithful, and she vows that she will never do it again. “I did it because I genuinely liked the other person. Yes, there was lust there, but it wasn’t just about sex. I just wanted someone to do things together with me. I think men are more likely to sleep with someone they’ve only just met in a club, although I also know plenty of men who wouldn’t dream of cheating.”
According to Brandy*, an infidelity expert, Sandy”s experience is typical. Women’s primary reasons for straying a desire for intimacy, to feel close to someone or to recapture some feeling of romance. Sex comes to it, but it’s generally much lower down their list. Boredom can play a part too. “Most women cheat as a last resort, because they’re not getting what they want from their partners,” says Brandy.
Brandy says most of the reasons women give for cheating are things that could be easily remedied by a partner who’s willing to make the effort.
I somehow agree to disagree. Sounds confusing, am I?
The question is, WHY WOMEN CHEAT? Wait, does it apply here in Malaysia? This article is taken from UK. I don’t know. May be it does relate to some of you.
As the magazine says, female infidelity is on the rise. Sandy’s case is rather common for these days. You may despise them, you may envy them, you may wish you had it in you, you may be even one of them. Whatever your view may be, women are more and more likely to be unfaithful. Even the infidelity expert, Brandy mentioned that women’s reasons for having affairs are generally more complex.
How complex can this be?
Let’s open up this blog for debates between men and women. 🙂