I have always missed the infant stages of my firstborn and now I get to embrace the precious moments again with my teeny tiny newborn son. Being a mama to a new addition in the family is undoubtedly physically exhausting but the journey so far has been very rewarding.
And having said that, this is why I haven’t had a chance to sit still in front of my computer to blog until now.
The transition of having one child to two is not easy. Many mommies go through this, I know. Somehow, through my lens, they all magically mother their multiple children with ease. But I know that in reality the struggle is real (as many mommies admit to this).
It depends on one’s expectations, too. And as a second time mama, I do know what to expect with my newborn as compared with the first time of knowing nothing. The only difference is, I have to fulfill my fragile newborn’s needs and satisfy my “spirited” firstborn’s desires at the same time.
Albeit having many things on my plate, I am thankful that I was given plenty of opportunities to handle several kids via babysitting. I was babysitting 1 or 2 babies for almost a year before I had my second child. This experience has enriched me, honing the skills of multitasking and managing multiple little ones.
In all honesty, I was afraid to be left alone after my husband returned to work (he took 3.5 weeks off when Asher was born). I was afraid that I could not handle the babies and household all by myself. I prayed. I cried. I yelled out to God.
“Lord, You have to give me strength! Grant me peace and give me multiple doses of patience! Help me, Lord!”
I’ve got to face the fact. My number of children has doubled. Things are different. Routines are messed up. Expectations have to be lowered.
There will be disappointments. There will be moments of chaos. There will be regressions with the firstborn. I am reminding myself to take a deep breath whenever my expectations are unmet; allowing myself to soak in God’s grace.
“My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9
Ready or not, the inner strength in me has to be stirred to uphold the fort at home. Ready or not, my life has been reset by a newborn and I will most probably be unable to get a good night sleep until he turns a year old. Ready or not, my lively and rambunctious three-year old daughter needs my daily guidance.
On a brighter note, all these will pass. Despite being frazzled at the moment, time will fly by so quickly that I will forget all about the exhaustion and chaos.
I am tremendously proud of being a mama of two. I am reminded of last week when I held my daughter’s little hand as I pushed my 6-week-old baby (in a stroller) at the mall. I held my chin high to know I’ve got two precious children.
Both my babies are the products of our love. Both of them exude joy in our family. It melts my heart to see my firstborn adoring her baby brother. It is utterly sweet when she tries to comfort her crying brother. It is absolutely wonderful to see how the siblings connect to each other at such a young age.
I am totally loving this. Breastfeeding, diapers, spit ups, coos and smiles, and fresh scent of the newborn. Also, the firstborn’s creativity of self-entertainment and her initiative to help. Oh yes, I am loving it!
Even though I doubted my capability a few weeks ago, with the full throttle support from my devoted husband, I am going to embrace motherhood all over again with more confidence (and more God’s grace)!